New Year, Same Attitude

I think it is fair to say that I officially suck at blogging. I know I always say that I have so much going on but that is absolutely true and I am sorry for it.

To start this off I just want to say HAPPY NEW YEAR! 

2016 is going to be a great year, why? Because I have simply made a list of my yearly goals in this wonderful thing I call a planner.

Number 1 on my list is probably the most basic one ever, workout as much as possible. Yes I know it's basic but the reason I put it at the top is because I am serious about it. I joined a gym last October and I am committed to changing myself into someone I am comfortable to be in. This goes along with number 2, eating better. I simply say this because I have become a hypochondriac. The internet is a terrible thing to look at when you think something is wrong with you, seriously don't do it. It has told me I should have 2 different types of cancer. DO NOT LISTEN TO THE INTERNET.

Number 3 is to save more money. Now that I have payments and bills to make I need to keep better control of my finances. I don't like the cheap stuff and that is causing a problem.

Number 4 and 5 go hand in had and that is to do good and be happy. To simply enjoy life.

Number 6 is to stay organized. I am actually a very organized person, hence the planner, but I need to stay in control of it and up to date with it. It holds my life.

Number 7 is to just be a better person, that is pretty self-explanatory right?

Number 8 is to take better care of myself, I mentioned this before and it is mainly telling myself to stay off the internet and just to take better care of my body, such as like stress reliever and face masks, stuff like that.

Number 9 is to enjoy the little things. I don't think I pay enough attention to this and I need to.

Number 10 is to do my best at everything. No need to explain that.

Number 11 is to make good choices, obvi a good one.

Number 12 is to prove everyone wrong. I want to prove that I am a good person and I can accomplish what people think I can't.

Number 13 is to LOVE MYSELF I cannot stress this enough. I took a minute and realized this is it, I do not get second changes in life and death. This is me and I need to love me.

Number 14 is do not be afraid to try new things. There are so many things out there.

Number 15 is to read more. I get too involved in netflix.

Number 16 is to be happy with my body, I've kind of already talked about this one.

Number 17 is don't fail at college, do my best.

Number 18. Figure out my life plan, what I am going to do with my future.

Number 19 is to move out of my parents house and live on my own.

Number 20 is to start blogging again. This is my sanctuary. I also kind of want to take up Youtube like vlogging and such I just don't know if I will be as successful as I want to be doing it.

Now you know all of my secrets. This is it. Make this your year and accomplish what you want. Love every second of it.

Thanks for reading! -xoxo Rach

Truth Comes Out

I am sorry it has been forever since I have posted. I have not found much inspiration lately. But lately I have been feeling down in the dumps, mostly because I have felt sort of alone. My boyfriend and I have just celebrated our 3 year anniversary yesterday. Then I sort of realized I have a very limited amount of close friends. My one good friend goes to college 4 hours away and we don't talk like we used to. I had a really good friend, we could talk, then it all stopped. I can't say anything because I think I have already said enough but I want to. Really bad.
I made a mistake and I cannot get it off my mind. I consider what if I make it again what will happen? I need to stop doing it but I just can't stop thinking about it.
College has also been kicking my ass too. I have been working and doing homework constantly. I recently got promoted to a manager at work and I love the money but I am so overwhelmed. I should be doing homework right now since I do not have to work today but I needed to vent. I created this blog as a secret way out. I have told very little people about it. I needed this as a way to escape from my reality. I love this blog. I love having a way out of reality.

Uh Oh

Okay so some stuff started to take a trip down hill. That new car I got, yeah funny story. I was at work and I park in a crappy parking lot and my car went underwater in a horrible flood and they totaled it out. Not even 2 weeks old, so I am back to hitting the car lots all over again. 
Bright side I did not get it licensed yet so I did not lose any money. 
Plus my college is paid for:)
Sorry short post just wanted to update!

On That College Grind

Hello Friends!
So things are changing and they are changing too fast. 
I am ready for the fall and some changes but there are some things I am not ready for. 
I am scared of college but I have had some experience in the college world. But this is just really starting to get to me. I have so many different thoughts about it and I am confused. I am not actually living on campus. I decided to go to a college in my town due to scholarship money and I am glad financially but I am just sad I am going to be missing out on the college experience. 
I also want to move out of my parents' house but money is of course an issue as always. My mother also has issues about me living with my boyfriend of nearly 3 years. She has her views and I have mine. 
I also received exciting news about college though. I should be able to graduate a whole semester early! I was thinking about booking it and trying to cut that semester down by working extra hard and fitting 15 more credit hours into 2 semesters. 
If you are reading this and are in high school, take college credits! It will be cheaper and make things a whole lot easier! 
Thank you guys so much for reading!!!
-xoxo Rach

Update!!!

Hey everyone! 
Quick update, my life is going good! Things are starting to look up and it is such a relief. Those of you who have been reading my blog for a while you know my struggles and the intense decisions I have been having to make. 
Well all of that is starting to look up now. 
Money is still kind of a problem but I am working on it! 
I just keep moving forward and working through the issues. 
More to come!

Thanks for reading

-xoxo Rach

Brightness is Happiness

Hello Friends! 
You may notice things are getting a lot brighter over here! (the page;)) 
I have noticed that brighter things make for a more positive outlook. My own personal opinion. I noticed that I am surrounded by a lot of dark colors and it honestly makes me feel kinda muggy and I hate it so I have started to brighten things up! 

So moral of this story is brightness is happiness. Keep a positive light in your mind. It really brightens things up!

In other news, a lot has been happening in my life! I have received good news and bad news so obviously everything evens out. 

Not much for this post just kind of wanted to update!

-xoxo Rach

Books, Books, & More Books!

This post is for all you book readers out there! My friend introduced me to a website where you can purchase books for extremely cheap. I purchased 'Beautiful Creatures' series for $15 and the books came in great condition!
http://bookoutlet.com is an amazing website! Although it may not have all the books you are looking for such as it does not have 'City of Bones' series in full, you can get some of them at a ridiculously low price! 
Books are expensive, I won't lie, and what you will read them once? Maybe twice? This website is a great way to save money!
If you are like me and love to read books go check them out! You will not be disappointed! Go Go Go!!

Too Good To Be True

It has been forever since I have blogged and I miss it so much. Blogging keeps me sane and let's just say the last month has been out of control.

1. My family is in a hectic situation and many things can change at any second. It is very stressful not knowing. 

2. My mother constantly hounds me about finding a 2nd job and it is just adding to my stress level.

3. The one thing that has turned out is I have found where I am going to college. It was not where I was planning but it will prevent me from spending a load of money and racking up debt. This is exciting for me but I am afraid of missing out on the college experience where I will be going to school and work constantly while living with my parents.

4. I hate living with my parents and I wish I could move out, but money is tight for me and I would love to move into an apartment with my boyfriend of nearly 3 years but I just worry about the money.

5. I need a new car, my car has reached its limit. It will give out any time soon and in the shape it is in now I will not get much for it. Which is sad. That is another reason I am worrying about money.

Money is life, literally. You basically need it to survive. Food, shelter, security, it all takes money. I stress too much I know but it is in my nature. I worry about every little thing and I hate it. 

Thanks for reading!

-xoxo Rach

Help!

I really need some guidance.

I got a scholarship to stay at the college in my hometown and it would pretty much cover all my classes but I have no desire to live in the dorms. 

The college I was planning on going to did not offer me any scholarships and I would have to end up paying off a lot of my tuition. I do not want to live with my parents here though.

I need help. 

Or a sign.

Hey Hey Hey

Hello everyone!

Okay so many decisions are still being made about my life and I am in a confused state of mind but I just wanted to share that I recently subscribed to a website called IPSY. I suggest you guys try it! Basically you sign up to receive gifts of certain kinds and it is called a Glam Bag, for $10 a month. I am super excited to receive my first bag but I am currently waitlisted. SO if ANY of you are willing to try this out please contact me and I will get you all set up and ready to go! 

Also I am still struggling with my money situation, I know that I did not post that too long ago, but I am still trying to figure out what exactly is going to happen in my life and I really want this to work out within the next 2 weeks and see what is going to happen.

I really wish you guys would share my blog with your friends, I am trying to grow and your guys' help is extremely appreciated! I love watching my blog advance and it makes me so happy! If I create my YOUTUBE video I hope you guys will follow me over there! 

-much love 

Rach

MONEY MONEY

Hello friends!

So I received a text today from my friend who was asking me if I wanted to move in with her into an apartment and attend the local college next year. 

I can honestly say I have not been more relieved. I have had a huge weight on my shoulders about where I was going to go to college, as you guys know, and this honestly made me so happy! 

It is cheaper to get an apartment vs staying in dorms, as I have totaled the costs so I feel confident about this, but I need to make more money. For all of this to work I need to get another job. Especially since my parents want me to buy a vehicle this summer. So I feel that getting another job this summer and save the entire paycheck from that job so I could have more money in my account. That is smart right? 

I am open to taking suggestions about even doing other little things to earn money. PLEASE inform me of anything that you think will help me save money. I would really appreciate it. 

-xoxo Rach

New Idea

Hello everyone!!!

Okay so I really want to improve my blogging life, it is like a huge dream of mine! So I came up with the new idea of doing DIY blogs! I love doing organizational things and fun stuff like that and I thought it would be fun to share my ideas rather than complaining about my life! So please let me know if you think this is a good idea or nah..

In other news, life is going pretty good since graduation, I am getting extremely bored on days that I do not work and I wish I had more going on to keep me busy because laying in my bed all day watching netflix is not healthy for me. That is pretty much it since my last blog, anyway short blog!

Thanks for reading!

-Rach

Gifts!!

So earlier I said that I would post some of what I got for graduation and here it is!

 I received this tote bag from my basketball coach and his wife. This is such an amazing gift and I am so excited to use it, there is so much room!

 In this picture I received a photo album I plan to put a ton of graduation pics in and a little coca-cola cup! & of course some cash!

 I got this insulated bag from my boyfriend's brother's fiancé' and it is so cute!

 This was a gift from my best friend, she gave me tampons because every girl needs them, and of course chocolate, bandaids, 5 hour energy, starburst, and hand wipes.

 Towels are always a plus!

 A little notebook with a pen

 This tote came from the teachers at school, it contained a pillow, plates, bowls, cups, silverware, oreos, twin, downy, dish soap, body wash, hangers, towels, extension cord, etc.

 This is just a basket that was made for me and it contains all my graduation cards.

 My boyfriend gave me this mini fridge that I have always wanted and the mason jars on top were filled with memories from my friends and they are absolutely adorable!

This was a gift from my parents, it's what I have always wanted, A Macbook Pro and I am in love with it!!

It's been real

Today was it! I graduated from high school, there is certainly many things I'm going to miss. I am going to miss sports mostly, I know everyone keeps telling me that there are intermurals at college but it is not the same to me. It is not competitive like high school and I won't have the thrill of making it to state anymore. There is just a lot I am going to miss. 

I think I have decided where to go for college or more of where I am leaning towards. I am feeling better about the choices I am making. Things are finally good.

I will most definitely post pics of some of the stuff I got for graduation I absolutely so excited for everything happening in my life right now. I am content, and I am happy. 

I have let go of grudges and enemies and now I feel so free and happy. 

I am really going to miss a lot of my friends. I now they always say that we will keep in touch but I have left a school before and said those exact words and it never happened. I feel like transferring schools once in high school prepared me for leaving all my new friends for college, but if I go where I am planning I will be around 2 or maybe 3 of my favorite people in the entire world and I am so excited but that means leaving one very important person behind, my boyfriend. I think he is okay with it and we will be just fine, Distance doesn't matter to me and I hope that makes things easier.

Thanks for reading!

-Rach

Goodbye Past, Hello Future

Senior year is drawing to a close. It has been an interesting last 4 years but they have been great. I am ecstatic to begin this next chapter in my life.

Deciding where to go to college has been a challenge for me but I realized that I will base my decision off of scholarships to determine where I go. No that is not as bad as it sounds I promise!

I want to go on adventures this summer and experience many new things. I want to go on trips and have fun. This summer is going to be the best one yet and I am determined to make that happen. 

I am so excited to begin this path. I love the new start feeling. So many things are happening right now and I am a little overwhelmed with everything but I don't even care. I have been waiting for something good to happen for a long time. I want everything to workout.

I have a big secret and I cannot tell anyone and holding it inside is absolutely killing me. This secret can make or break me and I do not know how to handle it anymore. I can't even take my own advice. There is nothing I can do either, and it kills me. I thought this feeling would pass and this secret would end, but it has been 3 years and nothing has changed. I don't know what to do anymore. 

This post had multiple issues going on and I am sorry but I just need help with all of this. 

-- Rach

Tests Are Overrated

I AM SERIOUSLY OVER TESTS!

I hate that I worry about how well I take a test and if I do not do well then I will not get into the college of my choice. Standardized tests are ridiculous!!! Everything should not be based on how well you take a fricking test! We are labeled by our test scores and that is not a way we should be treated. Most of my education is things that I will never use. But of course we are not in control of our own lives and our classes are chosen for us for stuff we will never use. We just have to pass them to graduate and will never use them again. We all take the same ACT, SAT, etc but why? We do not all learn the same or understand everything the same. We live in a messed up society. There is nothing we can do, and it is ridiculous. 

There is a 'No Child Left Behind' law saying that every child has to take the standardized tests in school. There are some kids that cannot take a test due to disabilities and may be dying. This is ridiculous. 

Tests like the ACT measure how well you can take a test. That is not right. No standardized test are! I really just needed to rant about this. Thanks to my friend Naomi, she influenced me to blog about this and she feels as strongly as I do about this. 

You're Too Good To Me

Everything is happening so fast. When they told me that senior year was going to fly by I figured it was just something they always said. But no, it is entirely true. It is crazy how fast everything is going right now. I am just getting invitations made and getting ready to send them out. I am still stressing over college and if where I am attending is going to be where I want to be. 
I know I said that I would have 'no ragrets' but I am seriously stressing. This was not how I wanted to end my senior year. I have settled old disputes and got new ones. I just feel like everything is escalating.

I like the fact that I can make decisions for myself. I am happy and content with life. I originally started this post about 2 weeks ago, I think I proved to myself that every week brings something new. Making decisions is difficult but you have to decipher what is important or what can be handled later in life. 

One big permanent decision I had to make was about a tattoo. Sounds crazy right? But it is not, if you do not like what you get then you are screwed for life. I didn't want to regret my tattoos because I want every tattoo I get to mean something to me. 

The ambersand symbol resembles a broken infinity, meaning nothing truly lasts forever but there is always an &. The bow and arrow reminds me that there are set backs in life but to keep moving forward. The words are my grandmother's words in her handwriting. I miss her everyday and I always have the reminder that she is always with me and I know she loves me too. 

-xoxo Rach

Want some inspiration?

Hey guys!

So I have been struggling what to post for a while now. I didn't want to just cry about my life on this blog about what decisions I am making and struggling with. I really hope you guys will leave comments about what you want to hear about or personal message me. I recently posted about a haul and I hope you guys liked it. I have also considered posting fitness inspiration and what I do and what I eat. Maybe even starting a YOUTUBE vlog type of thing. I would REALLY love to hear back from you guys!! 

-xoxo Rach

New Things Are Good Things

Hello Everyone!!!

I have not posted in forever and it makes me so sad!

I have been out of town lately and I went shopping!! 

I spent quite a bit of money for myself and I think I have definitely earned it. 

I got a job!!! Finally, I am so nervous and excited about it! It is at a store named Justice and I am so excited to start earning money again!

I took a break from work because it was my senior year and I had a bunch of stuff to do and work just did not fit into my schedule especially with sports. So now that sports is over and the school year is starting to come to a close and I will be graduation I thought it would be best to start making and saving money again because I do need to purchase a new car before college starts and I do not know how to pay for it throughout college because its going to take some time to pay for it. 

Besides all of this I though it would be kind of fun to do a sort of Haul blog. I will post pics of all my recent purchases and if you guys like them I can do more!

Maurices

I got these shoe for a buy one get one 50% sale and I LOVE THEM! Maurices never disappoints me and they are not expensive and totally worth it!

Victorias Secret

 I do not buy my underwear from anywhere else. I think the buy 5 for $25 is a great deal from Victorias Secret and these thongs are amazing!! They are so soft and comfy and lightweight! I can not tell you what the exact name of them. 

 I always stick to my lotion from PINK and I love it, I love the hot crush smell it is great!

Tillys

 I got these from a store called Tillys and I feel like it is a cheaper version of the Buckle and I love it. 

Tillys

 This cardigan is also from Tillys, it has strings flowing from the bottom and it is so lightweight and perfect for summer!

Tillys

 This shirt is from Tillys and I love it!! It is a racerback and I absolutely love the front. 

Forever 21

 I really needed some gold jewelry so this necklace is from Forever 21 and it was like $5.

Tillys

This necklace is from Tillys and was about $10 I think. 

Thanks for reading!

-xoxo Rach

Lost in this thing called life.

So I recently lost my mind. I thought I knew where I was going to college and what direction I was heading. I'm lost now. I really just wish I could take a year off but that is just not an option with my mother. 

I think I am going to stick around town for another year or 2, and then continue on. I wish money was never an issue. I want to travel and see the world. Isn't that what life is about? I want to find myself. I thought I had found the love of my life too and now I have a voice in my head and someone yelling in my mind "Why so serious at such a young age" I cannot argue with this voice, as it is coming from my mother. I do not understand why it matters. I am not the same as everyone else and I do not get the freedom I believe I deserve. I hate that I have someone judging my life every step of the way. 

Life is sure one hell of a ride. I just want to live it to the fullest but I have that constant worry that someone will be disappointed with my decisions. I worry too much, I know. I never know what to do. 

SO WHAT THE HELL! Go hard or go home. 

Thanks for listening.

-xoxo Rach